I read some talking points recently — supplied to a client by their HR business partner — that were engineered to help an executive feel less upset about a decision that did not go in his favor. The comments were clearly designed to butter him up. To continue the metaphor…

At the US Army’s Airborne School, candidates learn to parachute in rapid succession out of a c-130, 1,250 feet over a drop zone. Before they go up for their first jump, they learn to land properly (“Never look down at the ground!”). They practice drill after drill. And then they…

Have you ever been in such a rush to get somewhere, you miss your exit and make yourself late? A client said he was speeding to get his family to dinner on time. He missed his exit and added half an hour of rumbling bellies and recriminations to their journey…

Imagine Thanksgiving is now Thanksgetting. You have a whole day in which you dedicate time to getting as many thanks from people as you can. Are there some people you’ve been hoping to get approval from? Hey, now’s the day to get it! Don’t forget who owes you some gratitude…

If you fixate on where you don’t want to go, you’ll end up there. Once upon a time I set out on a misty morning for a ride in the Marin Headlands of San Francisco. I cycled across Golden Gate Bridge up to Hawk Hill and began a descent down…

Last week I talked about the duality of following and leading, two sides of the same coin. For that newsletter, click here. But I left with a question: if following helps leading and vice versa, how do you know when to lead, and when to follow? The short answer is…

Leading and following are a duality — you cannot have one without the other. But people get fixated on leading as somehow superior to following. That’s nonsense. If you want to be a better leader, you also have to be a better follower. When you think of leading, do you think of it being better, somehow, than following? I remember once working with a CEO…

“You’re forgetting that the act of listening is healing. So few people have been genuinely listened to, that when they are finally heard they start to heal.” So said my mentor in a recent conversation. I had expressed frustration at my inability to provide insights to a client who was…

Have you ever returned home from a meal out and discovered to your horror there’s a piece of food lodged quite evidently in your teeth or something hanging from your nose? And you realize, nobody said anything. There’s a good gauge of friendship: will someone interrupt your train of thought…